How To Get ‘Back On Track’ After Hardship

When we experience adversity in our personal or professional lives, many of us stop doing the things that contribute to our well-being and long-term success. The challenge we face seems to require 100 percent of our energy and attention. And while, initially, you may have to drop everything and attend to the crises at hand, the quicker you get back to doing those things that support your well-being and success, the quicker you’ll bounce back from the hardship that is staring you in the face.

This is resilience. (Resilience is a result of emotional intelligence (EQ) and is tied most closely to EQ’s second pillar of Self-Management.)

Research shows that resilience after adversity is common. The majority of people who experience trauma and deep stress eventually get back to their normal level of functioning if they apply adaptive (vs. avoidant) resilience-building strategies.

While a small percentage of people experience post-traumatic stress, others experience what we in the psychology world call “post-traumatic growth,” or an elevated level of functioning following hardship. This personal growth often results from gaining a deeper understanding of yourself and your values, a stronger feeling of purpose and connection to others, and learned wisdom.

That means that if you are facing hardship of any kind right now (like my community in Southwest Florida that is still recovering from Hurricane Ian), there is hope. You have the opportunity to move through this adversity and come out on the other side stronger, wiser, and more aligned with your authentic self and leadership vision.

A decade ago, when my life satisfaction plummeted as a result of career burnout and hitting rock bottom in my marriage, at first all I wanted to do was lie on my couch, snuggle with my golden retrievers, and drink wine. While that’s what my life looked like for a couple days as I indulged in those avoidant coping behaviors, I soon began practicing small acts that I knew from past experience made me feel better. I went to yoga. I ate some vegetables. I called my friends. I asked my mentors for help and met with the life coach they referred me to.

Little by little, step by step, feeling by feeling, small act of self-value by small act of self-value, I pulled myself up out of the numbing hole I was hiding in. I took 100 percent responsibility for my outcomes and made my way through the pain, the stress, the overwhelm – and suddenly found myself with new strength, wisdom, and purpose.

Resilience, joy, and success begin and end with you – no matter what life throws at you. You can choose to grow through it, or you can choose to just get by. To grow, begin by doing those little actions you know make you feel better. (If you need a reminder, click here to view my simple list of resilience-building ingredients.)

Be OK with choosing small right now to get you back on track. For example, you may not have time for a full 60-minute workout as you handle your crisis, but a 10-minute one will do wonders for your mental and emotional health and is waaayyy better than skipping your workout altogether.

Your team, your family, our community needs you. Take a step towards growth, then keep on going (and growing!). You’ve got this! 💪